Update is misleading. It implies there have been other observations written down. The truth is I'm always logging these strange new "adventures", "epiphanies", "things that make you go "huh!"".
It seems from the outside that lots of people want to express their concern and care for you through lots of chats and dialogue. "Hey, let me know if you ever want to talk, I'm here..." Or the random boy date you had who's just "checking in". First, it feels like too much. The last thing I want to do is chat more and make you feel better about my cancer. If I choose not to take on that role, it's gonna be a downer conversation and I'll feel bad for making the universe more heavy.
I'm not trying to make rules for how to communicate with friends, loved ones and even 4th date acquaintances you might know who are walking the cancer road (and believe me there are tons!) but here's a rule anyway:
Don't text "hey, how's it going? Just want to hear how you're doing...give me a call" Don't do this because there will have been 10, 12, no 20 other such texts and messages from other orbiting "friends". It's just overwhelming guilt and work.
Do: Hey, give me your address, I'm gonna send you something nice, funny, totally rad.
I know, I'm being a pooper, and people just care. But...do you? Or do you just want to feel better about yourself?
Lessons for me...it's ok to never respond back. Calculate your ROI. You matter more right now (well always).